How to become a good parent

Written by on 6th June 2019

Teenage issues bring many people to counselors. Anger, anxiety, mood disorders, social media use and addiction are among the problems faced by teenagers. However, good parenting can help prevent many of these issues.

In fact, children are our future. They are like clay that can be moulded into any shape. However, it is noticed that siblings exhibit different characters and behaviours even when they are raised by the same parents. Why is it so?

The ‘Container theory’ can explain the situation. Take a container. Pour some mineral water into it. Then some tap water. Later some coloured fluid. Finally, the container is filled but it contains entirely different fluids.

Similarly, a child is a container. It starts absorbing things from the time it is in the womb. What the baby sees, hears and feels results in character formation. Positive, negative and mixed factors influence the growing child.

At birth, a child is like a blank sheet of paper. Many people influence the youngster creating images on this paper. Up to 6-8 years, it would be the teacher who is the most important person for a kid. Even parents come later.

During teenage, 13-19 years, friends have the biggest say. By this time, youngsters develop distinct characters. If there are negative traits, they can be changed. Sincere efforts by parents, siblings and peers can help reverse negative behaviour.

Among the common issues faced by teenage children is anger. A large number of children find it much difficult to control anger. But this problem too can be addressed. For this, the parents should take the initiative.

Before meeting the child facing an anger issue, the parents should themselves need to remain calm and cool. They should then try to find the reason for the anger. It could be stress or some other development at the institution where the child studies.

A communication has to be formed between the child and parent. But the parent should not directly take up the matter of anger. Initially, topics in which the child has an interest have to be discussed. Gradually, the cause of the child’s anger can be referred to. It can be seen that such an exchange would certainly result in melting of the anger.

In short, the technique of anger management is that the parent has to be cool. The Global Scholar Programme of Lifeline led by Dr Jiji Vijayan understands the character, personality and learning style of a child and guides the youngster. This would enable avoid several teenage issues. 


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